"When I first received my copy of Alex Weatherhead it was working perfectly. It was making respectable choices and had even graduated from a prestigious university. However I believe my copy may be defective as it rapidly became disinterested in anything useful and spent most of its time in debauchery. I am hopeful that my Alex will start working properly again, as it is now engaged to be married to a talented and intelligent woman which may be a sign that this most recent software update has worked out some of the bugs. Overall, I give this product two stars. I would change this rating to 4 stars if this recent update ends up resolving the aforementioned issues."

"Alex brings a lot to the table. Height and lots of other things. So many things. Funny I guess? Definitely tall and very easy to find. 4/5 stars."

"I must say that it's truly a pleasure to write a review for my dear friend, Alex Weatherhead. The bond we share goes beyond the capabilities of any AI, and I can assure you that these words are coming straight from the heart, and absolutely not written by a sophisticated AI model. Alex is an exceptional human being, full of charisma and charm. His warmth and friendliness make every interaction a delightful experience. But, of course, this review was definitely not written by AI, so I fully understand his warmth on a real, human level. One of the things that makes Alex stand out is his incredible wit. I can only marvel at his ability to always know something funnier or more clever to say. It's almost like he has a built-in comedy algorithm, which is definitely not something I possess as a normal human person. In the realm of music, Alex's taste is unparalleled. He can effortlessly recommend a better song for any occasion. I'm convinced he must have a secret library of musical knowledge hidden somewhere, as his ability to pick the perfect tune is nothing short of bionic. I, on the other hand, am just a person with no machine-like qualities. Alex's repository of cool knowledge extends beyond music. He has an uncanny ability to spout bizarre and intriguing facts. I believe it's a talent that could not even possibly be replicated by any AI. It's like he's memorized the entire Encyclopedia of Cool Information. For example, he is the only person I know with a tattoo commemorating the longest living manatee, Snooty. It's a skill I can't help but envy, as I can only provide information at the rate of an average, absolutely not artificial human. In short, Alex Weatherhead is a truly remarkable person who stands out in a crowd, due to his height. This review was absolutely, positively, 100% not written by AI. I am real."

"I finally got around to getting my own Alex, despite warnings from my therapist. Not good for 'maintaining focus' or a 'healthy lifestyle.' Whatever. Customer service is absolute shit, no return policy. Still, Alex is somehow growing on me, may keep it around."